Wednesday, July 9, 2008

A boy and a girl

Staff: We don't adopt out our dogs for guard dogs.

Boy: I'm not lookin for a guard dog.

He's wearing a basketball jersey, gold rings on his fingers, white runners. A thin line of dark hair traces the profile of his jaw and chin from ear to ear.

Staff: That's funny because it says here on the application form you just filled out that you're looking for a guard dog.

Boy: Oh man, did I check that box. I didn't mean to check that box.

Staff: Right.

Boy: Yeah, no, we're just looking for a pet, right? See she really likes dogs, you know what I'm saying, and it's for her.

She's wearing a thin blue tube top. A short, tight, glittery thing is wrapped around her hips just enough to not really cover her ass. 3 inch heels. Full make-up regimen on her face. High maintenance hair and super hi-gloss nails.

Staff: She wants an unneutered Rottweiler?

Boy: It's her birthday.

Staff: Right. Well, we also don't adopt out our dogs unneutered.

Boy: Oh really?

Staff: Yeah, pretty much.

Boy: Is neutering going to make a dog into a pussy?

Girl: (Giggles.)

Boy: (Snorts, realizing he just made a funny.)

Staff: It might.

Boy: Well, that's too bad ... but he'd still be a big guy?

Staff: Yeah, neutering doesn't make a dog smaller. You'd need a shrink ray for that.

Boy: Uh ... good. Yeah, we saw that Rottweiler back there. He's good.

Staff: The one that was barking and crazy jumping up and down?

Boy: Yeah, that one.

Staff: You know, that one's going to need a lot of training. He's a handful.

Boy: Yeah, that's the one.

Staff: You sure?

Boy: She really likes him. She likes big dogs, know what I'm saying.

Staff: Okay, well maybe she should take him for a walk first. See how she feels with him.

Boy: Nah, that's okay. We can take him right now. I got the form filled out. And the cash.

Staff: Mm hmm. Well, we can't let you have him until after he gets snipped so maybe you can think about it for a bit.

Boy: When's that going to be.

Staff: Within the next couple of weeks probably.

Boy: Hmm, can you hold him for us?

Staff: No, sorry, we don't do holds. You'll have to just come back in. Sorry.

Boy: Fuck it then, come on. Let's go.

Girl: Yeah, it kinda smells in here.

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